This year’s theme, Operation Restoration 2019, is one that speaks to the true heart of Christianity. Restoration is the prevailing theme of the Bible. It begins with a perfect relationship between and mankind. Quickly, that beautiful relationship is destroyed because of the inherent tendency of man to follow their own wayward path rather than the one for which they were created. Even more quickly, in the midst of God declaring the consequences of man breaking that relationship with Him, He eludes to his restorative plan of reconciliation. All this in the span of chapters two and three of Genesis. The Bible then concludes by foretelling the imminent return of Jesus’ return to deliver His Kingdom of restored people to God the Father.
The Lord’s plan for his church is flawless. As individual members of his body, however, we are in the process of growth; we have not reached a state of perfection. There is no such thing as a flawless family or perfect work environment. Nor is there a perfect congregation.
Problems will arise within a church for a number of reasons. For instance, individuals will have different opinions. We must “speak the same thing” in matters of doctrine (1 Cor. 1:10; 2 Jn. 9-10), but there must be latitude in other areas. Different stages of spiritual development, personality differences, and misunderstandings can all contribute to tension. While we recognize that personal friction is inevitable, the New Testament commands us to work towards the resolution of all conflicts.
The Differences come from two sources: opinions and sin. Everyone has opinions. Opinions are subjective and based on such things personal experience, worldview, preferences, and tradition. Sins are objective and based upon the Word of God. Opinions change and are debatable. What God says is sinful does not change and is not up for debate.
Unfortunately, matters of opinion are more readily shared with one another than matters of sin. This is the exactly the opposite to what the Bible says we should be doing. In fact, the Bible puts expressed limitation on sharing opinions. We are forbidden to quarrel over opinions (Rom. 14:1) and judging one another over opinions (Matt. 7:1-2). God tells us the one who insists on sharing his opinion is a fool (Prov. 18:2).
Instead, He tells us to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to wrath (James 1:19).
While opinions might be helpful or destructive, sin is always destructive. Sin is always an offense to God and some sins cause us to offend one another. It is a matter of eternal life and death. Dealing with sin starts by dealing with ourselves. Jesus said that we are to deal with our own sin before attempting to deal with the sin of others (Matthew 7:3-5).
God wires us all differently and those differences will sometimes allow us to complement one another, but they can also cause us to be offended. When we are offended, we first must decide if it is a sin or not. If it is not, we must learn to acknowledge, accept and even embrace our differences.
If it is a sin, God puts the burden on both parties, the offender (Matthew 5:23) and the one offended (Matthew 18:15; Luke 17:3) to resolve their differences. Congregationally, the goal of this is to preserve the unity of the body of Christ. Individually it means reconciling differences that result from sin to restore the unity of the relationship.
Reconciliation means to restore the peace in a relationship. Since this is the theme of God’s redemptive plan in the Bible, we would expect that God would not be silent in telling us how this must be achieved; and we are not disappointed. The Bible addresses the subject of how to deal with sin that has disrupted the unity between Christians. Jesus, Himself, has given us a very specific, clear and concise plan of reconciliation recorded in Matthew 18.
First, Jesus tells us to handle it privately. Matthew 18:15 "If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. There are two words in this verse that highlight the first step of reconciliation: The issue needs to be a sin that we can point to in the Bible. It is necessary for the Bible to be the authority to which both Christians appeal. This is to be done privately(alone) and not to involve other people at this stage. In some cases, one might be able to seek counsel at this point if they don’t know if something is a sin or not. In that case, names should be left out. Or in another rare case to seek counsel about approaching someone regarding a particularly sensitive sin. Only if step one is unsuccessful, you move on to step two.
Next, Jesus tells us to involve others to help us reconcile. Matthew 18:16 “But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.” Sometimes misunderstanding happen between people or there may be adisagreement about what is a sin or just simply a misinterpretation of the actions of another. In such a case, Jesus instructs us to bring “two or three witnesses.” A witness is not necessarily an eye witness to the offense, but one that can witness to the truth. This is the “evidence” referenced in the text. Accordingly, the witnesses should be impartial. Sometimes taking a friend to approach another is the worse thing you can do. It might appear as if you are ganging up on the offender. People who can arbitrate between you, establish what happened and determine whether an offense has actually taken place.
We may not skip over this step. In fact, Paul instructs church leaders not to accept an accusation brought to them regarding another without the two or three witnesses (1 Timothy 5:19). If these witnesses cannot bring about reconciliation between the parties, the matter moves on to step three.
Having exhausted all efforts not to make this a bigger problem than necessary, Jesus now tells us to bring them matter before the church leaders. Matthew 18:17 “If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.” The church leaders are given the responsibility of final arbitration in the matter. In fact, the genesis of the role of elder was given by Moses under the counsel of his father-in-law for the specific purpose of arbitrating disputes and differences among God’s people.
These leaders are charged with determining who has sinned, if any, and bring about repentance. If the guilty party refuses to repent, Jesus says they are to be put out of the fellowship of believers and treated as an unbeliever. Jesus goes on to explain the authority church leaders have as they follow God’s word in this matter. Their actions are binding in heaven as well as earth. Again, sin is a matter of eternal life and death.
Matthew 18:18-20 “Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed* in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them."
Forgiveness is the path to reconciliation. In the rest of chapter 18, Jesus reminds us that if at any point a sinner repents, he must be forgiven. Repentance flows from confession. Confession is to acknowledge the wrong doing. Repentance is actively working not to repeat the sin.
The early church really took these clear instructions to heart. We can see an example of this playing out in the church at Philippi. In Philippians 4:2-3, Paul wrote:
“I exhort Euodia, and I exhort Syntyche, to be of the same mind in the Lord. Yea, I beseech thee also, my true yokefellow, help these women, for they labored with me in the gospel, with Clement also, and the rest of my fellow-workers, whose names are in the book of life.”
The cause of the problem between these women is unknown; however, Paul’s admonition to unity contains some key aspects for conflict resolution. Consider the following points.
1. The situation was urgent. The word translated “exhort” is parakaleo, literally “to call near, beside, into the proximity of.” It is rendered “appeal to, urge, exhort, encourage” Paul entreated them to resolve their difficulties. One must not “let the sun go down” upon his wrath (Eph. 4:26).
2. Paul exhorts both individuals. “I exhort Euodia, and I exhort Syntyche, to be of the same mind” (v. 2). Problems can be resolved when both sides are willing to sit down and work towards reconciliation. Most significantly, this calls for both sides to desire resolution. Offended parties may never agree on the nature of the blame, or the offense. But their desire should be to move forward with sincerity, humility, and love. Attitude plays a major role in solving problems (cf. Eph. 4:1-3).The principles for dealing with personal grievances are set out by the Lord in Matthew 5:23ff and 18:15-17. When a brother is aware that a spiritual sibling has something against him (i.e., a genuine concern), then that brother is obligated to initiate contact to resolve the problem (Mt. 5:23).On the other hand, the person who has an actual complaint (i.e., not a petty grievance) against a brother, is obligated to remedy the conflict as well. The stand-offish gripe, “he didn’t come to me,” is neither biblical nor practical. Both the offender and the offended are required to seek out the other so that these types of situations do not remain unaddressed.
3. Paul looks for intervention. “Yea, I beseech thee also, true yokefellow, help these women” (v. 3). Paul encouraged this faithful member of the church in Philippi to give assistance. He did not recommend that either member fire a shot of accusation, followed by a membership move to another church. Although this tactic is faddish, it resolves nothing. Noteworthy is the fact that Paul addressed this mediator as a “true yokefellow” (i.e., an authentic co-worker in the Lord). Similarly, in Galatians 6:1-2, Paul advised the spiritually minded to restore those overtaken in a trespass. Some people are more capable in dealing with volatile crises. Others may get caught up in a “feeding frenzy” of excitement and controversy, assuming the worst of the elders, the preacher, or other members. A qualified person can assist in problem-solving by focusing on resolution. He will not become part of the problem. As the apostle Paul indicated, a capable intermediary may be able to make a positive contribution in settling a conflict.
Because of what Jesus has said, Paul knows the souls of people are at stake. Accordingly, he finishes by saying “Yea, I beseech thee also, true yokefellow, help these women, for they labored with me in the gospel, with Clement also, and the rest of my fellow-workers, whose names are in the book of life” (v. 3). The work of the church suffers as problems go unresolved. Attitudes of hostility and resentment have no place in the Lord’s church. We all are trying to live for Christ. Can we not maintain that perspective?
Christian unity is the product of Christianity in practice. Through prayer, and the application of texts like Matthew 18 and Philippians 4:2-3, God’s people can all work and worship in unity; the bond that holds us together is love (Col. 3:14). We will have a perfect environment in heaven. Until then, the Lord expects us to work out our problems — staying focused on heaven.
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